Potty Training Survivor story

Now, if you’re anything like me, you’ll have read the potty training books.  Adventurously titled ‘how to potty train in 1 week’ or ‘potty training for dummies’.

Now, my favourite line I read was ‘make your toddler sit on the potty every 15 minutes for 5-10 minutes at a time.’  If you’ve ever had to cage a stray lion, then you’ll be well practiced at this part of the process.  If you’ve not, you’ll need the following before you begin:

  • A fencing mask to protect your eyes.
  • Lion handling gloves to prevent biting.
  • A rugby player, who is good at scrums.

By the end of day 1, if you haven’t already given up, you can guarantee your sofa will get christened, as will your floor.  If you are really lucky, you will have avoided both.  If someone was really looking out for you, you’ll actually get some potty action too (and think you’ve won the war!) Only for it to be snatched from you a few hours later.

Bedtime becomes the holy grail!  You say a little prayer that day 2 will be better.

Day 2 brings much more wrestling.  By now you think you could give Hulk Hogan a run for his money.  You begin to see a glimmer of hope.  It’s round about now you realise that kids don’t come with instructions.  That day and a half of wrestling was in vain, as they seem insistent that they know better than you and the book.

You panic you’ve given the little person a complex from all the badgering.  Half way between frustration and giving up, you think ‘what the heck’ and leave them to it.  What do you know, Mother Nature does know best and the little blighter did know better after all.

So, ok your Blue Peter badge is in the post.  Your sofa and floor breathe a sigh of relief.  But your task isn’t over yet.  Oh no, your journey has merely just begun!

The book didn’t quite go into the fact that you rarely get to leave the house on time now, out of fear for your car upholstery.  Your life is now hoping that you don’t have to get the potty out in the middle of the bread aisle in Tesco.  You also know how many paces you are to the nearest loo, or blind spot at any given time.

Ofcourse, you’ve heard the saying ‘never trust a fart?’  Well kids don’t at this stage.  You’ll be at the potty or toilet for every wee, poop and any wind breaking incident.  It’s now that you regret moving the potty from your main living area.

If you have more than 1 loo in the house, they will take a preference to a different one each time.  Sometimes they’ll have you visit more than 1 on each occasion.

Any random accident has you paranoid that they are regressing.

The only thing you have on your side is time.  With time it all gets better.  Also with time comes 7pm, when you can finally put your feet up and relax!

How has your journey been?  Can you see the light?

 

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14 Comments

  1. hahaha! That made me laugh out loud!
    We survived potty training…Just…lol My girls are 11 & 6 so those days are long behind me! I’m so glad….hehehe x

  2. Ha Ha so true. We actually found potty training relatively easy with my big girl, of course she had accidents and still does occasionally but it wasn’t too bad. This just means that when the time comes to train the littlest she is going to be horrendous I reckon. 😉
    Katie @mummydaddyme recently posted…About Time…My Profile

  3. you are right. time is important. we didn’t hurry our eldest and as soon as she was ready at about 2 and a half 3 years old she went straight on using the toilet. we didn’t have the potty situation. Now because i am home i am thinking that maybe i should get my 1 year old used with the potty. Time will decide if it will be a good idea or not.

    Thanks for linking up with the #pinitparty

  4. So glad you survived it! Potty training is the one thing that throws everything out the window. Just when you’re on a parenting roll and in a good routine you have to potty train! Ahhhh!!!! x
    Donna recently posted…Living Arrows – 2/52My Profile

  5. I always thought the ‘teach your child potty training in a week’ type books sounded a bit unrealistic. Our son’s only nine months old so not at the potty training stage yet.
    Jonathan recently posted…Will our son like haggis?My Profile

    • As like most of these books, it’s a guidance. The biggest tip I have is do what suits you and your little one best. Every kid is different after all and no one knows your child quite like you. Trust yourself and those instincts and you can’t go far wrong 🙂 thanks for reading!

  6. To be honest, I just didn’t read anything about potty training. I ignored my mother-in-law who often told me it was time to ditch the nappies and waited until he wanted to do it, which came 2 months before his 3rd birthday.
    He refused to use a potty, only using the toilet and accidents were few and far between.
    I think that because we put him in control (and Father Christmas have him some extra cool CARS pants) he reacted better than we expected.
    I know they say that children are in nappies longer, but frankly, if my little girl takes to using the toilet as well as he did, I really don’t care.
    frazzled ma recently posted…Sinful but virtuousMy Profile

  7. We are in the middle of potty training at the moment but we are taking each day as it comes. We’re definitely not trying to do it in a week. Harry is 29 months now and is aware of when he needs to ‘go’, its just that the time between him telling us and him actually going is a little too short sometimes, more so for ‘numbers 1’s’! He still wears a pull up when we’re out and he does still try and give us as much notice as possible but we have the security of the pull up!
    I know he’ll get there and there is no pressure.
    Michelle x
    Michelle @ A Family Chatter recently posted…Saturday Caption #1My Profile

  8. Love this post you have just had me giggling. We started training my son when he was 2yrs and 2 months. He is now 3 and a half and still has the odd accident. He has only just really got the hang of it in the last few months. Felt like I was banging my head against a brick wall for a year! Absolute nightmare. To say I’m filled with dread about training son number 2 is an understatement.

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